You may be asking yourself similar questions at some point in time.
–> Am I with the right one?
–> Is this the right relationship for me?
It is not uncommon to have little doubts here and there in a relationship, no matter how long one has been in it.
Experts pointed out that it is absolutely healthy to ask as this means that you are concern and think about you and your partner’s happiness and making sure that both of you are aligned to embark on the same direction.
But what if, this doubt has been constantly ringing in your mind?
- Are there visible signs your partner is in this with you?
- Do you see red flags appearing more frequently that may affect the relationship?
We all have different needs and goals in certain times of our lives and it is normal to have them as we are growing and evolving as an individual.
It is the more you should relate your concerns and needs to your partner so that they are align with what you are thinking and find ways to compromise and work things around to achieve your dreams while not jeopardising their own goals and dreams.
But what if none of you has the courage to voice out your needs? Just because you are scared of rocking the boat, scared of causing the relationship to turn sour and in the end losing each other, or worried being labeled as the troublemaker, you go silent?
If this is what you are feeling, then it is high time for you to rethink about your relationship and see if your partner is indeed, the right one for you.
This is by far one of the most important factors in considering whether the relationship is sustainable..
Are there similarities in the immediate and future life goals between you both? Sometime people have serious goals and find themselves in a relationship that conflict with them.
As the relationship progresses to become an important part of their lives, some people will compromise or adjust their own personal goals to accommodate the relationship. Some people will not.
What if you plan to get married and have children in 2 years time, but your partner wants to focus on his career and kids are out of the picture?
What if you want to get married but your partner is happy with the existing monogamy relationship arrangement and do not wish to commit into a marriage as yet?
Or what if your partner needs to relocate but you prefer to have your roots here?
When these goals are different, it could signify major ongoing issues in the relationship in future.
Even if the chemistry is strong, if your goals are radically different and you are unable to compromise, this can be a reason to end the relationship so that each of you can proceed with your dreams and find someone in near future who will be willing to be part of your goals.
It is always helpful and fair to communicate your needs to your partner, and even if things can’t be worked out at the end of the day, by letting go shows how mature you are as an individual and how much you care for the growth and happiness in you and your partner.
You don’t feel good yourself
He jeers you off instead of cheering you on.
Time spent with your partner should make you feel better about yourself, not worse. If your partner pin-down your self doubts and undermines your confidence, then that’s a major red flag that this is not a good person for you to be with.
You deserve someone who is proud of you for who you are and is supportive and excited with all the great things happening in your life, not someone who crushes your self confidence and controls you in every way possible and hindering your growth.
If more than half of the 10 times you feel unhappy, it is time to reconsider this relationship. Of course there are ups and downs in a relationship, even the happiest couple fight, but if someone does love and consider you as his significant one, he will take into consideration about your feelings and not belittle or demotivate you most of the times.
No one enters into a relationship to suffer. Period.
Your values differ
Your perspective on life doesn’t match, in any way. Values are the principles that guide the way we live and make decisions. The list of values is nearly endless: being respectful, generosity, volunteerism, animal rights, compassion toward the poor, and so on.
If you are deeply spiritual and your partner has little interest in spiritual matters, the two of you are sure to encounter a barrier that separates you. When this happens, you will experience intense frustration and disappointment.
It is best to have an in-depth conversation with your partner as soon as you realise this might pose a challenge between the two of you.
Your communication walls break down
Intimacy for two people requires the sharing of their deepest feelings, thoughts, dreams, and fears. If there is a significantly different level of desire for heartfelt communication, the relationship will surely suffer.
The inability to be on the same page can sever the bond easily. In solid relationships, two people learn to manage their conflicts thoroughly and efficiently so that harmony prevails most of the time.
If whenever you feel scared to bring up an issue to your partner as you may not be heard or worse still, your partner brushes you off and jeered at you being silly for voicing it out, trust me, there are better ones out there who are more than willing to hear you out and work together with you in building a more solid relationship.
We’ve all been there. We know in our hearts that something is wrong, but just can’t bring ourselves to face it and admit it. You keep brushing off tell tale signs that the relationship is moving towards the red flag zone, and shrugged it off thinking that you are over analysing or self-sabotaging the relationship.
You don’t want to believe something negative about your partner, or you want to ignore the fact that all you two ever do is argue when you’re together.
Or it could be you are a single parent and want so much to create a family nucleus with your partner for your children and willing to suffer in silence just as to maintain this status, overlooking all the flaws in him.
Whatever the reason, as long as you start to ignore the facts and start giving excuses to compensate for the negativity, you are definitely not in the right relationship.
True love is not about two people clinging to each other; it can only be fostered between two strong people secure in their individuality.
A shallow person will only have shallow relationships. If you want to experience real love, it is important to first sincerely develop a strong self-identity.
Trust your gut and be courageous to love yourself enough to let go of someone who isn’t right for you.
I can’t stress enough that it is important for anyone in a relationship to form deeper understanding about their relationship theme.
Not only it helps to understand the strengths and further develop from it..
You know where the cracks are and be delicate enough to tend to it and turn the situation into a positive one.
With the help of modern astrology, professional astrologers like myself, utilise the art of constructing synastry and compatibility charts of a couple.
It not only brings to light, deep insights about each individual’s characters, deepest fears and needs, it also allow couples to identify what are their inherent potential and challenges in their relationship chart which are only unique to them and no one else.
While I decipher what the universe has in place for them, it is all about the free will of each couple who would decide whether or not they wish to ride the storms and reap the fruits together.
Remember, there is no perfect relationship. It can only be nurtured through constant adjusting and compromising from each other to reach there.
Compatibility between two people is tricky; how does one find someone that fits just right?
Our expectations have changed in recent years and as the current 20 somethings move into their 30’s finding a life partner seems to be getting harder and harder.
We are evolving as human beings, with more complexity of desires, feelings and emotions. Finding a match that can fill our souls and hearts needs is more complex than in ages past when standards and roles were different.
If a relationship is not meant to be, sometimes, the best thing for us, is to let go so that we can welcome a new chapter in life.
An in-depth consultation to your relationship energies and vibes will help you to gain so much awareness of the themes, the people and situations you are likely to attract.
You are your own self-manufactured magnet and to attract the right relationships and abundance into your life, you first have to condition yourself
to the right state.. and understand how to make the best out of it..
A basic consultation
is a good starting point. If you are ready for a real deal, an in-depth personal private session is the best gift you could gift yourself.
Let The Stars Be Your Guide. Take Charge Of Changing Your Life Today. Discover the psychology aspects of your relationship between you and your partner.
Nothing matters more than achieving and obtaining a loving and harmonious relationship. I’m here to listen so feel free to talk to me.
Find out what a man truly needs before he decides to commit in a relationship. If he is truly the one you feel he is meant to be for you, and you want to do all you can to realise this relationship, check out my self-help program ‘Make Committed Love Happens’ and turn your wishes into a reality!
It is non-manipulative, and you will have him love you in the most unconditional and natural way. It is not just all about him, this program also allows you to reveal your love language and what you truly deserve in love. You matter too!
Lots of Love,